I've been thinking ..
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.. would I rather be happy working hard healing those who don't want to be healed or working hard making a lot of money for myself?
My decision to go into nursing stems from helping someone in dire need (another story for another time). Helping those who can't hep themselves seemed like a great career to me! What joys and rewards await for me! But like many things in life they are not always as great as they seem.
After working in the hospital for nearly two years I have started to see a trend. 80% of my patients don't want to be helped. My first inclination of this was after an exhausting 2 months of saving a man's life (who was high on meth, stole a van, ran from the cops, wrecked the car, and then was smashed into by another car) woke up and the first thing he did was flip me the bird and say "fuck you". The following several weeks involved the patient hitting, kicking, and spitting on the nursing staff. During the same time a young 23 year old female was a restrained passenger in a car roller over died. For some reason we were able to save the wrong person.
Sure, I believe in second chances, as rare as it might be that dick-head of a patient MAY grow into a functional, productive member of society but It is extremely doubtful. His one goal in life is to get out of the hospital only to get high again create more problems for tax payers.
Everybody loves grandmas! But not where I work! Theses grandmas can drink even the rulliest Irish dock workers under the table. When these grandmas drink they fall. Crushing their skulls, bleeding everywhere, and creating burdens for everyone.
My point being, I work my ass of. What do I get? The same decent paycheck. Sure I get paid a decent amount but I could do less work and still get paid the same amount. Now I would be okay with everything if maybe, god forbid, my patients would actually thank me for our work. Is it too much to ask for after I saved your life? After I wiped your ass?
I'm too the point now where I want to work hard for myself. The harder I work the more I make and the happier I think I will be. This is the part where my readers say "money won't bring you happiness" and I reply by saying "that's what poor people say". There is a lot of joy for working hard and being rewarded for it. There is NO reward for helping drunk, drugged, assholes.
This is getting too long ..
The End
Side note: 1 in 100 patients are actually thankful and a joy to take care of. Those are the rare moments that I hold onto to keep me going. Forgive my poor sentence structure and grammar. I am exhausted and am more interested in bed than editing this post, night!
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